Charlie’s Story: Parenting through a Pandemic & Beyond

There aren’t many people who feel they’re better off following the 2020 pandemic, but Charlie is one of them. And we’re honored that Sister Carmen Community Center (SCCC) played a small part in her transformation.

Charlie was born in China in the early 1980s. In college, she worked part-time as a tour guide. That’s where she met her husband, who was visiting China from the United States at the time. They married in 2006. After college, Charlie’s career in international business was taking off following China’s entry into the World Trade Organization (WTO). But her husband was a research scientist with limited opportunity in China, so he wanted to move back to the U.S. They settled in Colorado in 2007.

After living in a big city like Shanghai with a population of 20 million [in 2007], it was a tough adjustment for Charlie. The transition eased as she immersed herself into working at an Asian restaurant in Louisville and volunteering at Doorways English Program for International Women in Boulder. From time to time, she would coordinate business deals from China and earn a commission.

She never thought she wanted a family of her own, but as she approached 30, she started to think she might regret not having children. Her first son was born in 2013, followed by a second in 2017. Her husband was so focused on his work that all the parenting responsibilities fell on Charlie.

She was already treading water as a single parent, but when the COVID-19 pandemic hit—with the kids home all the time and few opportunities to interact with others—she knew she needed support.

“We couldn’t go anywhere or do anything. Even the playgrounds were closed. Life felt so unfair. Why did I give up everything to come here and end up like this? I had so much bitterness in my heart that I couldn’t pour out anything sweet. I didn’t have anything left to give. I was so frustrated with not knowing how to parent two boys into responsible men, so when I saw Sister Carmen was offering parenting classes online, I signed up.”

She started with our Nurturing Parenting Program (NPP) focused on younger children and then later took our Active Parenting Program (APP), which focuses on ‘tweens and teens. Now she’s a parent lead with our Circle of Parents (CoP) support group. Originally started to help parents experiencing substance abuse in their family, CoP has become a place where many parents who have completed our other parenting classes turn for ongoing support.

Next Charlie took our Bridging Digital Divides program to improve her computer skills. It taught her how to use the Google software suite used by the local school district. Then she focused on her leadership skills and civic engagement knowledge in our Family & Leadership Training Institute (FLTI). She further honed these skills when she served on Boulder County’s Community-Driven Policy Pilot Cohort. Charlie gave back to Sister Carmen as well by serving on our Participant Advisory Committee (PAC), offering valuable feedback on how to improve our programs and services, and helping with events. 

During the pandemic, Charlie also decided it was time to separate from her husband. He paid off the house for her and the children, but provided no other financial support. Charlie took a Financial Health Course offered at Sister Carmen through our friends at Philanthropiece that helped her figure out how to manage her finances to support her family with her three part-time jobs: Chinese Interpreter, Facilitator for Dare to be You, a statewide program focused on strengthening at-risk families; and State Adviser evaluating early childhood centers.

Now she’s working with our Pathways to Economic Stability program to earn an Early Childhood Director certificate from Front Range Community College. This will allow her to double her income with one job that provides a steady paycheck.

Charlie credits all the training she received at Sister Carmen with giving her the confidence to pursue a brighter future. “The pandemic and my family issues brought us crashing to the ground but—with help from Sister Carmen—we’ve been able to stand up, and now we’re racing uphill.”